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look for the girl with the broken smile
mia_love

maybe i should stop going with the flow and take the opportunity to shape this thing the way i wanted it to be.

the thing is... i don't know what is there, neither do i know what they want, and with this thing split into different things, it's hard to get perspective and even a big picture scenario in place...

this is what is restricting me, what makes it different from having my own team, my own role, where i can flex my wings and strategize on my own...

let's see....

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think of me
mia_love

i'm feeling it now. i am so disappointed with myself. :(

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mia_love

i hate that i'm gaining weight :(

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mia_love

one of these days....

when i am brave enough.

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mia_love

i think this is how it's going to be from now on, growing old alone...

i didn't imagine it would be like this, not the alone part, but the growing old part. still, it's here, and i can't do anything about it...

:(

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mia_love

there's that sudden realization that i have never felt so alone.... now and in the future...

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mia_love

sometimes you get to thinking that great things don't really happen twice... maybe it really doesn't, i am still waiting for the second one. but maybe, that was all there is, on that for me.

and sometimes you'll get to thinking, if this is all i know, if i am still growing, or if i need to move on.

i wonder when i have turned out to be this great scaredy-cat?

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1 thought or think of me
mia_love

for the child who grew up thinking she was adopted, when she really isn't...

for the child who grew up thinking her family is her real family, but it really isn't...

one found her real family, the other is losing her real family...

which one is hurting more?

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mia_love

it feels like a korean drama. where one of the leads suddenly turn psycho so that the other lead will be the better option for the girl. like everwhere else, it is what the audiences want, so that is what will happen.

too bad, i like the other lead. and though i don't religiously watch that show. it feels forced, his transformation.

still, i wish he will still get the girl in the end.

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mia_love

it is hard to live outside your head...

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